Avoiding Stress in Unhealthy Ways and What to Do Instead

We all face stress. Whether it's work, personal life, or just the constant juggling act of trying to “do it all,” stress can sneak in and quietly take over. The problem isn't always the stress itself, it's how we avoid dealing with it that can be the most damaging.

I’ve been there, many of times, and chances are, so have you. I wanted to share a few ways I’ve personally avoided stress in unhealthy ways, and how I’ve learned to handle it differently over time.

The Unhealthy Ways We Avoid Stress

1. Staying Busy
Do you ever feel like if you just keep moving, you won’t have to face what’s really bothering you? That has been my go-to for a long time. Staying busy made me feel productive, but deep down, I found that I was using it as a way to avoid facing what was stressing me out.

2. Choosing Easier Projects
Instead of tackling the work that truly needed my attention (but came with challenges), I’d default to doing something “easier” or less demanding. It felt good in the moment, but ultimately, it pushed important tasks down the line and added more stress later. There is a time and place for easier or less time consuming projects, knowing when to tackle which is important. 

3. Disconnecting from People
Stress can make us retreat. I’ve caught myself pulling away from people, not because I don’t care, but because I’m overwhelmed. Numbing out, isolating, or avoiding conversations were subtle ways of disconnecting from my support system.

4. Toxic Positivity
This one is sneaky. Saying “I’m fine” when I’m really not. Brushing off my feelings with a smile. There’s a big difference between optimism and toxic positivity — and sometimes pretending everything’s okay just adds to the weight we’re carrying.

How to Acknowledge Stress and Actually Work Through It

Avoiding stress doesn't make it disappear — it just delays the inevitable. Here’s what I’ve learned about facing stress head-on and finding healthier ways to move through it:

1. Slow Down
Sometimes the best thing you can do is pause. Take a breath. Step away from the noise. Slowing down allows you to see things clearly and get grounded before moving forward again.

2. Practice Vulnerability
This one takes courage, but it’s powerful. Let someone know what’s going on. Say it out loud. Whether it’s a close friend, a coach, or even journaling, vulnerability helps us process what we’re feeling instead of pushing it away.

3. Set Boundaries
You don’t have to say “yes” to everything. Protect your time and energy. Learn to say “no” without guilt and create space for what truly matters.

4. Eliminate & Simplify
Not everything needs to be done right now. Look at what’s on your plate and ask: What can I let go of? Simplifying your commitments can immediately lighten the load.

What Helps Me — and Might Help You Too

When I start feeling overwhelmed, here are a few tools I lean on:

Positive Self-Talk 
“I can do this.”
“I’ve done hard things before.”
“I’m capable.”
How you talk to yourself matters. That inner dialogue can either build you up or break you down, so choose words that support and empower you.

Break It Down
When everything feels like too much, break it down. One step. One task. One win at a time. Small goals create momentum and momentum creates progress.

Final Thoughts

Stress is part of life, but how we respond to it is what makes all the difference. If you’ve been coping in ways that don’t serve you, you’re not alone. We’ve all been there. And I have been there a lot recently. The good news is: there’s a better way. One that involves slowing down, being real, protecting your peace, and building yourself up.

You’ve got this. And I’m right there with you.

If you're looking for a simple, effective way to support your mindset and reduce stress, check out my 31-Day Challenge in the shop. Each day offers a small but powerful lesson or tool to help you feel more in control, grounded, and empowered — no matter what life throws at you. Start your 31-Day Challenge here and invest in yourself.